Tyler’s 2022 Naughty & Nice Lists
I ran out of lumps of coal, so if you were bad all you get is this email
Happy Christmas Eve, you hoe, hoe, hoes! If there’s one thing that gets me in the holiday spirit, it’s judging people. So, without further ado, here are my 2022 Naughty & Nice lists.
Let’s start with the Naughty list first because that’s more interesting anyway:
The family of 5 that included two sick children and a toddler with an ear infection and 105 fever on a 6-hour flight over the Pacific Ocean from Seattle to Honolulu (these children ran up and down the aisles wildly coughing on everyone and were the center of a medical emergency in the middle of the ocean, but I got a $100 flight credit from Alaska Airlines so I almost forgive you)
me, for going to Hawaii even though Islanders have asked tourists to stay home and said it’s harmful (I’m sorry)
Elon Musk (obviously)
every single human being involved in the creation of Emily in Paris Season 3. This excludes Lily Collins for reasons I shouldn’t have to explain.
war criminals
And here’s who made my Nice list (suckups):
Pete Davidson (I swear I can fix him)
my downstairs neighbors (because I talk myself out loud in my apartment so often that they thought I had a roommate, but when they realized I don’t they were really cool about it & didn’t make me feel weird)
me again, for randomly deleting all my photos on insta because it honestly gave cool and mysterious vibes 10/10
people who donate to charity, I guess
every single person who subscribed to Big Deal this year (your name is on here twice if you read something and told me it was funny after, ilysm)
ta-ta for now, & see you in 2023!
Tyler
Big Deal
(P.S. Mark our emails as “not spam” or I’ll come down your chimney tonight, eat all your food, and force you to watch the 2005 Pride & Prejudice movie with me.)